Wow! I can relate. I often saw traits in my son that were odd and knew there was something wrong; but I was unable to describe these behaviors in a meaningful way to our pediatrician. I felt guilty for not knowing what was normal and what wasn't.

It is extremely difficult to look at your first born and admit he isn't perfect. It doesn't get any easier when it is your second child and the symptoms are in her as well.

Dwelling on what we didn't do doesn't help them today. We just have to love and accept them and move forward. They are still our beautiful babies.

Hindsight is always 20/20. You can't undo what has happened and regret what you didn't do. You were doing your best and trying to take care of your son. There could have been any one of a thousand different things wrong with him. How were you supposed to know it was autism? don't beat yourself up for something that has happened. You did everything you could and eventually it got you to the right answer.