Ha, ha. Regional differences in endearments can be very confusing. I suspect there have been many confused conversations. I've been confused on occasion and have definitely given the wrong impression to others.

farmwifetwo - I probably would love your white hair, just as I did mine. My 14 year old granddaughter, Rachel has the loveliest silver streak in her hair and its natural. I hope she never dyes it. I've finally learned not to comment on "pregnancy" or as they now say, "baby bumps". I have been so sure people were pregnant only to find out it would have been better to have kept my mouth shut.

Calla, dear, (kidding) I understand and accept it just fine when it's a habit that people use as endearments - its pretty obvious to me the difference between something meant sweetly and a put-down. Love

Back East where they still have diners, the waitresses often call customers 'sweetie', 'sweetheart' or 'dahlin'. No one takes it personally - it's expected. I really miss diners. Just another reason for you to hate the East coast.

Thank you guys so much for understanding. The unintended insult that bothered me even more was when a man asked if my husband was my son! The man is still alive, but I was so upset inside, My husband is almost ten years younger than I and his hair has almost no gray in it - lots of people think he dyes it, which is an insult to him, but anyway, after I lost lots of weight I haven't had people ask if I am his mother. On the other hand, his younger brother has had white hair for many years and was asked if his mother was his wife. Of course, my husband got his genetic brown hair from his old mother! Ma'am is another one that I think no one likes either, like you said. What a silly thing life can be!

Wow...I think I would have taken it as an insult too.