Having a child will change your life but one day finding out that your child has special needs, or better yet, Autism, can be so life altering that families can either pull together or be ripped apart. <!--more-->Every family will eventually respond to an autism diagnosis in their own way.

Because caring for a child with autism takes time, energy, patience, resources, flexibility, finances, and most importantly, a sense of humor. A child with autism can bring out the best in family members; compassion, kindness, charity, self-sacrifice. But, it can also bring out heart ache, depression, frustration, grief, and guilt.

Therefore, families with children on the autism spectrum need outside help.

According to Nicole Cleary, the Board Chair for IDEAS, families need

1. Information about autism and the treatments that are effective.

2. Skilled respite care because all parents need a break.

3. Professional help organizing daily routines for children with autism and help teaching self-care skills in the home.

4. Effective strategies for dealing with difficult behaviors.

5. Help finding and accessing services and resources in the community.

Because AJ has never had a diagnosis of autism (but institutional autism) and because we got little Early Intervention help we are just now getting some help in these areas (although it is still very little). We have done much of this ourselves and have gotten most of our help through our fabulous Meetup group.

The best things we did for ourselves was move closer to family, get AJ involved in a special needs community program (which also has led us to his respite care, which we pay for), and join the Meetups group for special needs (the local mommy and me play groups had trouble accepting special needs kids of AJ's level).

How have you felt since your child's autism diagnosis and how does the diagnosis affect your family? What types of things do you wish you had access to that would help you better function?